Marcel Legros - Play the Game of Life

The most difficult thing I’ve ever done was to admit I had a drinking problem and walk into the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous. It’s also been tough to decide to break my anonymity to tell you what it was like. I’m doing that now because I want to share my experience, strength, and hope. I want you to know that no matter how bad your situation, there is a way out. I’ve made every mistake in the book, but I’ve learned from them. I only write about topics I know something about, so if I can help you, or you have any questions, please email me at marcel@marcellegros.com.

The Long Slide

I was a daily drinker for about 17 years. I drank to relax and to socialize. I drank to celebrate and I drank to numb pain when I felt bad. Alcohol gave me social courage to speak my mind with other people - something I was unable to do when sober. I would drink as much as I could afford as long as I still paid my bills. I showed up for work every day with a hangover and a sore throat (from snoring all night). I felt that my drinking was all right as long as I was responsible. I wasn’t an angry drunk and I never got myself into other drugs or criminal trouble. Drinking seemed to make life more enjoyable, so as far as I was concerned, there was no problem. There were signs of the storm that was brewing on the horizon, though.

The longer I drank, the more negative and isolated I became. It bothered me that I didn’t feel emotionally connected to anyone around me. I had lost a part of myself but had no idea how to get it back. I buried myself in playing video games and drinking every night until I went to bed. Then I’d snore like a banshee and cause countless hours of insomnia for my poor wife. I slowly gained weight all over my body. I didn’t like looking in the mirror anymore. I was repulsed by my gelatinous gut and a puffy face because I knew that it wasn’t me anymore - it was the booze. As the disease progressed, I made a lot of awful choices and my marriage nearly fell apart. The consequences seemed too much to bear and I became suicidal. If I hadn’t decided to seek help, I wouldn’t be here today. I walked into the rooms of AA just before I lost everything.

I Know Four Things With Absolute Certainty

• Alcohol is progressive. It sneaks up on you very slowly and corrupts your thought patterns and emotions over time. If you’re an alcoholic, you begin to engage in more activities that allow you to drink and shun those that don’t have alcohol involved. A glass of wine with dinner may progress into a bottle or two, in a few years time. If you can have one drink and then easily walk away without wanting another, then you probably don’t have a problem. If you are a daily drinker, drink to cope with problems, or frequently drink till you pass out, then you’re probably an alcoholic.
• The disease is terminal. Alcoholism always leads to illness, isolation, financial disaster, emotional suffering, and in most cases, a horrible death. There are many paths to that end, but all of those paths lead there sooner or later.
• Alcohol is cunning, baffling, and powerful. You cannot outsmart it. Diseases don’t think - you can’t think your way out of cancer and you can’t think your way out of alcoholism. It can lay dormant for years and take hold of you again when you least expect it. Unless you thoroughly follow a recovery program, unhealthy thoughts will creep in and quickly lead you back to drinking. Alcohol is powerful partly because mainstream culture tells you it’s socially acceptable. The problem is, if you’re an alcoholic, the first drink buries you, not the last one.
• Your life will get better if you follow a program of recovery. My choice was AA and it was a good one. I had reservations about it, but I can tell you that today, my life is full of hope and happiness. I feel connected again and every day brings new blessings. I have my life back. You can have this too, if you want it.

If You Have a Desire to Stop Drinking

Seek out the help that is available all over the world. AA is free, it’s filled with people that know what you’re going through, and it works. It gave me my life back and it will do the same for you, if you take the first step.
To find an AA meeting near you, visit http://www.alcoholics-anonymous.org/.